Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash
Sunday dinner. A weekly ritual connecting our family in three locations. The conversation moves to privilege of birth, statesmanship and expected behaviours of those in high position. I’m at once engaged and soon detached, hearing myself fall into arguing with my grandson, Cameron.
My detachment sparks a realisation: Liminal states are common. Whenever we let go of a state of being that no longer serves us and evolve to a new state of being, we move through a liminality in time, space and mind.
Cameron’s a beautiful man. Kind and generous with a strong sense of equity and justice. He’s a working man. Neck deep in superannuation regulations at the Tax Office during the week. Knee deep in mud with the Army Reserve on weekends. He’s a learned man. Now in his third year studying philosophy and politics at Melbourne University.
Cameron’s in that liminal time. The organised world of high school is a memory of time being managed to the moment. Time is now in his hands. How and where he spends time after university is unclear. In his liminal state, he’s building his own sense of value, vision and responsibility.
Cameron’s in that liminal space. Daily dependency on home support has evolved to semi-independent cohabitation with adults. In his liminal state, he’s building capacity and preparedness for a new space in the world, a space of his creation.
Cameron’s in that liminal mind. Daily prescriptions of an industrial education system lie withered as university opens a mind to challenge dominant paradigms, while subtly introducing others. He pays attention to where he pays attention. A strong idealism is rushing towards the clear glass wall between him and a pragmatic future.
We of older years recognise liminal states for what they are. A time for learning, a space to build capacity and a mind to challenge paradigms that no longer serve us.
We of older years have been through these before. University. Job loss. Ageism. Serious illness. Threat of catastrophic illness. These trigger liminal states that challenge how we use time and space and meet the bigger challenge in the mind.
We of older years would do well to challenge our mind. Reinvigorate our imagination. Be inspired with the idealism and enthusiasm in our younger generations. Retain hope for the future. Help them face the harsh reality of this liminal time in a COVID suspension.
Walking together, we earn the rights of passage from the ritual states that no longer serve us to create states of being more connected, caring and courageous, serving the planet and people in This Century.
We have a responsibility to walk with our younger generation through these liminal times. Listen to their dreams. As the song line goes, “the one they pick’s, the one you’ll know by…” [1]. Then support their lead in ways that builds their capacity to engage with the systemics of life, while conscious of our own liminal states.
It’s been several months since I last wrote a newsletter. I’ve felt stuck. I’ve been meandering at play with different ideas when I came across an old interview with Paul Simon [2], shortly after he’d finished writing Bridge Over Troubled Water. He was asked to unfold the creative process of this powerful song.
With his guitar he explained where the song started. how it changed, and how he got stuck. He said, “everywhere I went led me to where I didn’t want to be”. So, he listened to a range of music including gospel, and eventually the melody unfolded for him, including bits he admitted taking from others. “That’s how songs happen. They piece themselves together.”
What I love about this is his presence of mind. He didn’t need fixing or rescuing. He listened to past gurus but used his internal guidance to understand where he didn’t want to be.
Eventually he was content with where he was, and his liminal state with that song was over. And we get to enjoy the masterpiece it is.
Liminality is not a COVID-state we have to get through.
Liminality is learning, growing and mind changing.
Liminality is bringing pieces together with internal guidance.
Liminality is life in motion.
I trust you are enjoying a life in motion.
[1] Teach Your Children, Song by Graham Nash, released on the album Déjà Vu by Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young released in 1970.
[2] Paul Simon On His Writing Process for 'Bridge Over Troubled Water' | The Dick Cavett Show. Accessible on YouTube https://youtu.be/qFt0cP-klQI